They were formed with some hesitation. Would they look weird on me? Could I pull them off? What if they didn't work and all of the pain and effort weren't worth it? What would people think? And even the question of who I was came into mind. And so began the journey of self worth as tangled as the hair I was knotting up into chords of thick hair. Maybe not the beginning, but definitely a mile marker. I had toyed around with altering my appearance before- a peircing here and there. But this was drastic. A woman's hair is her crown of glory- or something like that. And I was taking a leap. And so four years ago I permed my hair and, with the help of my friend Aleighsa, I put my hair into dread locks. I will admit at first they were awkward- ugly even-, but I felt this sense of no return as I looked in the mirror. Sure I probably could have washed them out at that point, but why would I want to? They were symbolic, they were bad a.
Little did I know that they would serve a profound purpose in my life. Little did I know that as I began the process of contemplating cutting them off that I would be met with hundreds of memories- four years worth of good and bad, of friendships forming and friendships lost, of major life decisions and so on. So I have decided that I will write a brief series documenting the process of my dreadlocks, and in turn the process that has led me to the person that I am now.
This is one topic that I would really appreciate feedback on. You all have been a part of this process either directly or indirectly and I value your words.
Shalom,
Jaime
2 comments:
gladly. i remember the smell of night one when the perm happened. i knew you were b.a. when i first met you. but that night, it was etched in my heart..."get to know jaime b. she will change your life." so true. so true. i love you. not because of your killer dreads, but because you know how to love more deeply than most.
and i won't lie. your dreads hitting the top of my head as i crash into you is comfort. pure comfort.
i am honestly sad by this loss.
it's silly perhaps... but not so silly.
they have not defined YOU - but they have defined a time of your life.
a time of your life that we became who "we" will always be.
a time of your life that has been hard and ridiculously overwhelming - but has been surrounded by so much beauty.
so, i grieve - but i also rejoice.
jaime butler... best friend...
your shaved head will encounter new stories and adventures.
we'll look back on your deadlocks and smile - and then we'll look ahead for what's to come... as you wear a stylish hat in the winter, to keep that hairless head warm.
i adore you.
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